14. Save me from myself?
Available in A1 (h594 x w841 mm) & A2 (h420 x w594 mm) sizing.
Printed on Ilford Galerie Smooth Pearl.
'Save me from myself?'
I'm at the hands of myself,
Laying at the path of choice,
The bed linen cloaks the coward, Fixations on the dim lit ceiling,
While my mind paints alluring pictures, Wistful illustrations of ancestral failures,
What never was, what was always,
Coasting effortlessly into nothingness, Another discussion with the reaper,
He slumps, but he never stays down, Waiting for me to lapse,
And I'm slipping,
My heart feels heavy, my body paralysed, Cold blood chokes my veins,
The plan is not foolproof,
As the fool can stop the pain,
Two tears leisurely race down my cheeks,
I don’t think I want to go, not yet…
But I'm gradually losing grip,
How did this happen again? Why?
I reach for the phone and inadvertently ask for help,
They counter with love and I can't feel it,
I drift into sadness, a breakthrough emotion,
The gratitude towards my devoted loved ones,
They don’t abandon me,
Even when I’m convinced they will, Formidable guilt suffocates me and I start to sob,
A series of text messages and missed calls appear on my phone,
Somebody loves me and tomorrow might be worth the fight.